So my browser crapped out on me this weekend, a thing I have never experienced before. I am a Mac user and I've just been happily using Safari, the Apple in-house browser that came with this machine. Internet Explorer came along, but I never used it. Except that then this weekend my Safari browser started doing a weird thing. Whenever I would try to type in a form field (such as for instance the box where I might log in to my Blogger account or try to write an email message or where I'd type some search terms) Safari would crash, usually with that little spinning rainbow thingie that in my mind is mostly bad news. It happened over and over again. So in order to try to produce something for my small but select readers I opened Internet Explorer. The version I had was so old (this Mac is two years old almost to the day) that the "Create Post" page on the new blogger didn't show the "publish" button. Not only that but IE would freeze about half the time I tried to check my mail. I could read it my mail in Safari but not write any, and I suppose I could write in IE if I could get it to actually open the mailbox.
The timing of this was great as I was feeling particularly stupid and in the "what-is-the-point-of-my-existence-again?" mode. No, I'm not being ironic. It was good. It got me away from the computer for a while. Of course, I got out of the house, for life drawing, for my weekly trip to T.J. Maxx seeking creative and non-hideous Storage Solutions for various odds and ends that now reside on the dining room table, and the Dog Adventure. Swain's Lock which is even nicer than Riley's Lock. Wrestling with Misha about half the time because as soon as she had stepped out of the car and had a pee, she was ready to go back in the car. And every time I stopped to look at something (is that another beaver?, etc.) she took that as the indication that she must lead her back to the car. There weren't very many people there today as it was cold, miserably cold for April. I expect about the time it gets nice enough to go paint there it will be full of people and bugs. But not to worry: I have my iPod.
So I got home to night unable to communicate with the rest of the world. And so in a sort of panic I downloaded a third browser, Opera, and what a nice surprise! Other than the fact that it works, it also displays all these little blogger-related features like the buttons on the "Compose" page that I was resigned to not having on my Mac.
But I still feel rather stupid.
I've actually had to take a time out from some of my other little writing projects because, well, I think I might have just gotten to the point where I don't know what I'm doing. So it seems best not to do anything for a little while. Or maybe I am becoming stupid. I'm just saying I feel stupid, I'm not saying I'm stupid so you'll run to assure me I'm not! I can go longer and longer intervals without that kind of juice, you know.
What I think it is is that I feel overwhelmed. I suppose I ought to try to get some control over things.